-Your spoiler is higher than the roof of your car.
-Your exhaust sounds like an elephant fart.
-A tennisball will fit inside of your exhaust tip.
-You think performance stickers will actually increase your cars horsepower.
-You think that your 115 hp 4 banger is faster than a 300 hp V8
  just because you added a Nuespeed sticker.
-Your wheels stick out past your fenders.
-Your car makes less than 155 hp, and has racing stripes.
-You consider a K&N filter & a big exhaust tip to be major modifications.
-You lie to your friends about winning a race (when you actually lost).
-You think Honda's are the fastest cars around.
-You can't see outta your back window because of all the stickers.
-You rev your tiny engine every time you see a Mustang or Camaro.
-You tell everyone that your car is fast, but you know its' really a slow P.O.S.
-Your car has performance stickers,
  but does'nt actually have the parts that the stickers are advertising.
-You bragg that your car makes 90 HP per liter (when its only a freakin 1.3 liter engine).
-You will not race a V8 powered car
  unless the owner is willing disconnect 4 sparkplug wires.
-You brag about not using nitrous when your car has another type of power adder
  (ie. turbo, supercharger).
-You have a "Powered By *Anything*" sticker on your windshield.
-You tell your friends that you smoked a big V8 powered car
  (but you don't mention the fact that it was a 18 wheeler).